This was not easy going up and down the halls with. Youd have a chance at least. or asleep? I do know that I am, and I cant overcome it, I mean. Who else recorded it? And I didnt wanna, like, marry you? One night I rounded them up, put them in a cage, doused them with But how was I to know? So, hey, Lise you wanna go see Judas Priest at Nassau Coliseum? But then one of the other doctors popped in, called him Nigel, mentioned something about badminton so I thought: probably not. She didnt think shed actually die, just found out that her boyfriend slept with someone else and she wanted to punish him by ending up in hospital and not letting him visit her for a bit. So how can I be yours? But I should tell you right off the bat this is not going anywhere. Poor Martin. And you with all the talk about love .only make them nervous and easier for us to. It wasnt her intention, but it wasnt a total accident. I recommend reading a bunch of monologues below and then just making a gut choice. The musician. Based on Thornton Wilder's play The Matchmaker, Hello, Dolly! Oh shit, maybe not. Cornelius Hackl: Because I'm gonna light some candles under them. Book by Music and Lyrics by MICHAEL STEWART JERRY HERMAN Based on the play THE MATCHMAKER by Thornton Wilder Original Production Directed and Choreographed by Gower Champion Produced for the Broadway Stage by David Merrick and Champion-Five, Inc, DOLLY Property of: 4 Lyries~@ Copyright 1963 by Jerry Herman. There are some who would be grateful for that--the plot is but a flimsy excuse to string together song and dance numbers. Literally. She was a human rights observer sent to interview him. I cant believe it. Ugh! Hello, Dolly! I said Im gonna go hump the fridge. Martin, I said. And Lost my Anonymity Along the Way. I mean, where the hell did that come from? Matchmaker Dolly Levi is a widow, a matchmaker, and also a professional meddler --but everything changes when she decides that the next match she needs to make is to find someone for herself. Not enough to live with. Im even gonna get a compact disc player. Your mum must be pretty stoked that youre not taking me. And it just defies all reason. Can you believe it? Martin couldnt stand unidentified smells. Hello. Horace: All the facts about you are insults! Boom. It wasnt my fault, was it? All other trademarks and copyrights are the property of their respective owners. Dolly Levi: Money, pardon the expression, is like manure. Or wasted? Im trying to get something started, and she up and turns on the light and starts to cry and says weve got to talk. library of free monologues. Three people died. Flowers, notes, guinea-pig memorabilia were left outside in her memory. You stand there trying to look so deep when youre nothing but a solipsistic bully with your grandiose self-importance and lectures and arias and lets-look-at-the- fucking-canvas-for-another-few-weeks-lets-not-fucking-paint-lets-just-look. Louis Armstrong's recording of the title song, Hello, Dolly! Dear Lord Jesus, I do not often speak with You and ask for things, but now I really must insist that You help me win the election tomorrow, because I deserve it and Paul Metzier doesnt, as You well know. Jude: . To get young players with experience I literally interviewed 1,000-2,000 people." BARBRA ARCHIVES 'HELLO, DOLLY!' PAGES: OVERVIEW (FIRST PAGE) Well, all power to George W I dont want the fucking pricks to win, either. Gorgeous, fresh-faced, heels, wearing a skirt, new top, little bit sexy, on my way to save my caf and yes, I am strutting. . I thought, I dunno, I thought maybe they were so close together they felt like one, or maybe when one was down there, the other was off doing somethin else like I dunno, I just never thought about it. Set in New York City at the turn of the century, Hello Dolly! But if farts were flattery, honey he would be Shakespeare. Youre in way over your head. But- I guess I do care what my peers think about me. I went in and there was Martin sitting bolt upright in his chair with his nostrils quivering and the most terrible look on his face. - Definition, History & Artists, What Is the Tango? (Holding a can of vegetables.) Monologues are presented on StageAgent for educational purposes only. Ive been trying to rationalize them away, pressure from the wedding, the intimacy of working together, but I cant. When it was time for her to leave, he asked if he could look at her face for a while so that he would have something beautiful to remember in the long months ahead. The men are eyeing us for the wrong reasons. Maybe Ill never walk down the aisle with a smug look of bridal triumph. Hello there, how are you? Im sure you two will have a real great time. In this lesson, we will examine this peculiarly successful musical. I think, hello, hes not going to tell me to do something Oedipal, like fuck her or somethingbut that wasnt the problem. " from Fourteen " Tommy Has Proposed " from An Ideal Husband (Mabel) " You Won't Misunderstand Me " from The Goal (Sir Stephen) " You're Quite a Girl " from 42nd Street (Julian) " You've Got to Come Back a Star " from 42nd Street (Julian) It is a key ingredient to a happy and meaningful life. Tricky though. .I'll give you the short one Oh Mrs. Molloy! Because the fact is you are in a relationship. My wife left me. And out of you she sees herself more proper Your email address will not be published. Im fine now. Because the truth is despite all facts to the contraryI still love you madly. I hope youre not suggesting Im marrying your father for his money. Hes passing, hes passing. But I do. Like, What the fuck were you doing having a kid months after breaking up with me, like You said you were like me, you never wanted kids, like Damn straight I look good I havent been sucked dry by tit-leeches. I worry for a second Im going to make a sex offender out of the poor guy. I mean Im fifteen and worried about every little thing, and Ive got this fucking sumo wrestler in a housecoat trailing behind me. We don't currently have any monologues from Hello, Dolly!. Hes not moving. Not literally. Not every painting has to rip your guts out and expose your soul! Yknow, about authentic love. They just don't make musicals like this any more. So, I suddenly go off on her, like, this sophomore in high school, but Im all screaming in her face Dont look at the package, take a look in the mirror, you cow! Way under list price, payments deducted from my check. So that made it easier. All right. My mum was always saying bring Corey with you on the weekend and shed go all flushed and wear low-cut tops in the kitchen. I think you are an amazing woman, I honestly do. Corey was older than me, bigger than me and a whole lot cooler than me. I dont do anything to give off any kind of interest whatsoever, I completely look the other way when I see eye contact happening and they STILL come over thinking theyre so suave and its simply repulsive. based on one crazy, thoughtless, inexplicable romantic night. I see a man walking towards me from the bus stop. Ive only got one pair of feet. Having a really great comedy piece will make you stand out and allow you to show off your range as an actor. I know, right? And she says physical attraction is part of whats between them, and its her body. Emily: Stop seeing each other or going out or anything like that. I know where all the nukes are and I know the codes. So great. Irene Molloy: Minnie, I don't mind that you never finish your lunch, but I do mind that you never finish your sentences. But the problem is.despite every fact I can muster, theres something that still doesnt check out. Shes so pathetic. I embellished a little. I know all that. l realize that it was Your divine hand that disqualified Tammy, and now Im asking that You go that one last mile and make sure to put me in office where I belong, so that I may carry out Your will on Earth as it is in Heaven. I used to walk ahead of her in the mall or, you know, not tell her stuff at school so there wouldnt be, whatever. Im just, I feel that we should maybe stop before we get too far. I'm feeling an updraft in my underpants! remains in the common repertoire, though It Only Takes a Moment is making a slight comeback due to its use in 'Wall-e'. This team includes Andrew, Alex, Luke, Jake, Indiana, Patrick and more. Meg bought me this T-shirt at the Warner Brothers store, and its got a picture of Superman on it. How about Duke Ellington, Ella Fitzgerald, Judy Garland, Liza Minelli, Marvin Gaye, Benny Goodman, and Frank Sinatra, among others. My entire life! It won a Grammy and was number one for 9 weeks. Shes really crying hard now, and she goes back into the bedroom. You probably think Im some spoiled brat whos never had it hard cause I didnt have to walk a mile to school. Just for a minute. He would hate me for telling you but hed lost control of his bowels. plays nightly (excepts Sundays) at 7:30 PM through June 10, with additional matinees at 12:30 PM and 4 PM on Saturdays and at 4 PM on Mondays (starting May 8) and May 12 and 19, at Hale Centre Theatre (9900 South Monroe Street, Sandy). Whats my thanks? Shakespeare in the Woods 2023 Season But then I was thinkin, well what would I like better have a woman or a man feeling me? James: 11 chapters | But none of those times were quite right. Dolly Levi: Mr. Kemper, do you mind if we go inside? Get over it. Tim: I thought this isnt it, I have to breakup. I mean, youd never know you were in a box, would you? All lacy with dogwood, literally flooded with jonquils! It's not worth a thing unless it's spread around, encouraging young things to grow. Join StageAgent today and unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. Is he crazy? Im going to admit something I never thought Id admit to anyone ever. (a beat) She knows everything Im ever going to do before I know it myself. She looked at it, and then she looked at him. There are days when I rather be a man.. (gets on knees and begs) Cmon, I gotta meet my Mom. Backstage is the top resource for acting monologues content and jobs that will help you land your dream opportunity . Then, everything about me was entered into a computer where they created a model of my mind. Horace: You are a seven-foot-tall nincompoop! Who might be your mother, The monologue must be from a play or musical you have not performed in. Look, I gotta say I wasnt like this at boarding school, I didnt like getting smashed on rocket fuel and talking about vaginas, honestly I had no interest in Alcohol at all. I butter the mans toast, Elisa. It's a little lumpy, but it rings! Im crazy. You were nothing before you met me! Apparently. Foul is most foul, being foul to be a scoffer. Think of the unlucky grown-ups and the elderly who lament the day they decided not to go to the Prom. Christ almighty, try working for you for a living! The change of climate from East Tennessee to the Delta weakened resistance I had a little temperature all the time not enough to be serious just enough to make me restless and giddy.